We can all get to that point in a relationship where we feel like we’re dangling from a fine thread, between keeping and losing your partner for good.
That, or you’ve broken up, but still feel there’s a way to get to where you were: together.
How do you win someone back? Without sounding or acting needy?
How do you regain their affections and keep them… for good?
We can’t control other people. We can’t force them do what we want them to do. But what we can do is focus on ourselves and influence their behaviour because of it…
Using 3 simple steps, you’ll find yourself happier, healthier and, ultimately, able to win him back…
1. Give them space
When do we want something most? When we can’t have it.
Calling, texting and essay-writing constantly is smothering. It’s not reminding them that you exist – it’s repelling them.
Recognise the following thoughts?
‘but if only he knew how much I love him‘,
or ‘but if I say this, then he’ll definitely realise I’m the one for him‘,
or ‘but he’ll forget about me if I don’t message- he’ll think I don’t love him‘,
Yes? Sound like you? I’ve certainly been there –
Well, grab your things and wave goodbye to any possibility of getting back together, because these are the thoughts which will ruin all your chances of winning them back.
A man will be more compelled if you’re not there for him on a plate: it’s more of an accomplishment: he’s got to earn your time and respect. You’re not just a toy he can play with, as and when he wants.
Allow for breathing space, and time for them to wonder what you’re doing that’s better than talking to, or seeing him.
2. Act happy
Men are attracted to women who are happy, enthusiastic and give off the vibe of being okay.
He obviously saw something he likes in you because he’s been with you. That confidence you oozed when he was first with you, that is part of the reason he wanted to spend time with you, so don’t lose it!
It is counter-intuitive, but when women fixate on a guy obsessively, they destroy their mood and ability to be attractive.
Neediness is a fear of loss
When you believe that you could lose something, you’ll instinctively want to regain it – and neediness is a part of that, you end up worrying, and ultimately don’t act like yourself.
Even if you don’t feel it, act happy – don’t let insecurity creep up on you – retain that high-value attitude: you deserve him! Any man will put the effort and investment into a woman he respects.
Keep healthy and happy and that energy will translate, and you’ll instantly become more attractive.
When you become attractive to men, men will want to date you. Men will want to lock you down. Men will want you to be exclusive with them. You will win him back.
3. Have your own hobbies – and actually do them!
The best way to win him back is to show him that there are other things in your life taking up your time.
Go out with your friends regularly, keep up your hobbies, work hard at your job. It’s incredibly easy to give up all the things you love when you are worried over your relationship someone, but it is at this time where it’s never more imperative to keep them up.
You can still feel those feelings – just go out there, meet more people and generate activity in other areas of your life. When he sees that, he’ll learn he has to prove himself worthy of your time. It will be a challenge, and consequently, he will start being curious about you again.
If you follow these steps, you’re on track to win him back
Finally, if he doesn’t put in the effort or looks like he’s happy to let you go, then cut your losses – put yourself first. If he doesn’t seem like he cares, with little investment, then it sounds like he doesn’t deserve you in the first place.