Alice In Wonderlust Dating Blogger

In my series of spotlight interviews, I wanted to interview one of my fellow dating bloggers, Alice in Wonderlust.

Alice is a prominent face in the dating blogging world, with her award-winning blog, Alice focus’ on her dating escapades, trials, tribulations and thoughts on the confusing world of dating. She’s also recently ventured into the world of magic!

I asked Alice a series of questions so we could all get to know her a little better…

We’ve known each other a while now, which is great! Especially in the tiny world of dating bloggers, but how did you get into blogging about dating? Was it a conscious decision?

Even from a young age, I’ve always been fascinated by relationships, so I think it was a natural progression for me. Around 5 years ago now, I decided to start an anonymous WordPress blog to showcase my writing. It was around the same time that I first started online dating, so the blog ended up being mostly dating stuff. When I started my first job, I worked with a lot of influencers and it was then I first learned that blogging was something you could make a career (or at least, a side-hustle) from, so I started a conventional fashion/ beauty/ lifestyle blog. Eventually I got tired of the time commitment of running two blogs and realised neither had longevity, so I decided to combine them both into one, and Alice In Wonderlust was born.

What has been your worst dating experience?

When I was 16, I met this guy through friends and almost instantly fell in love. I crushed hard for months, and when we eventually started seeing each other I was over the moon and thought he was everything I’d been waiting for. Until I found out he’d been on a replica date with another girl that he’d been seeing behind my back. I felt like my heart had been ripped out, and it really messed me up for the next year or so.

What would you say is the best way to meet people nowadays? How do you find it easiest?

I’ve had more success meeting people organically. Meetup is pretty good, but in terms of meeting guys the groups can be a bit hit and miss- broad interest “young professional” groups tend to be better. You can find cool girl friends anywhere though. Dating apps can be good too if you’re more picky about who you meet in person.

You have strong life goals, and want to settle down, get married and enjoy love – it’s so frustrating seeing that you’re having so much trouble finding the one! How would you want to shape your future going forward, and if you could say something to your future partner, what would it be?

Aside from finding a partner of course, I’d like to have more of a work-life balance, be able to earn a living from writing and other creative pursuits, and have strong friendships. I’d also like to do some form of volunteering or something else altruistic, and finding meaning and purpose in life that way. If I could say something to my future partner, it would probably be something like “thank you for finding me, and I promise to do all I can to keep our relationship strong and live a long and happy life together”.

We live in such a social-media, and aesthetic orientated world, how do you think that’s affecting dating and relationships?

I think it can put more pressure on aesthetics, particularly given that a lot of dating these days happens via apps, where you pretty much look at someone’s picture and decide whether you want to date them or not. Platforms such as Instagram where you see so many pictures of gorgeous girls can make people feel insecure and more likely to resort to beauty alternations such as lip fillers. However I find dating organically (through friends etc.) is less shallow, and ultimately it’s about personality and feeling confident in yourself.

What has been your best achievement to date?

There are a few I could pick from, but I would have to go with appearing on This Morning to talk about being a virgin in your twenties. It was good publicity for my blog and it pushed me outside my comfort zone, but most of all I’ve had quite a few people be nasty to me about it, so boldly talking about it on national TV felt like a great way to fight back.

If you could change one thing about how people date, what would you change?

Hands down- the time frame in which people are expected to have sex and people’s attitude towards intimacy in general. There seems to be this mentality where you have to have sex by the third date to be tested out to see whether you’re “worth” dating, whereas I’d rather see a return to 1950s style dating where you could take your time then get intimate with someone when you’re more committed.

What are your future plans for Alice in Wonderlust?

Aside from continuing with the blog and growing my following, my main goal for next year is to diversify into fiction writing. I like blogging, but I feel like novels are where the money is, and where with a bit of work my writing ability could really shine. I did a couple of public speaking events last year and loved it, so I also wanted to get into stand-up comedy. Watch this space!