Ask Eve: The Love Of My Life Has Been In Front Of Me All Along, But Now He's Taken

Hi Eve,

I’ve had one of those mad realisations that you see in the movies. When the girl is in front of the boy she’s known forever as a friend and realises that, actually, she is meant to be with him.

There was always bad timing – one of us or the other would be in relationships. Neither of us actually knew how the other one felt. We were friends since children and we both just presumed it would never happen, or that we were friend-zoned.

The thing is, I know this now – or at least I think it, but he’s in a new relationship and I’m single. I don’t think they’re right together – what do I do? I can’t ruin his new relationship because of selfishly believing that he’s the one meant for me. That we belong together. It’s just annoying on my side because I don’t want to go my whole life in wrong relationships until we’re too old to make it work.

Please help!

Confused reader.

Dear Confused Reader,

Unfortunately my lovely, this is one of those situations where there is very little you can do but wait. I know this isn’t what you want to hear, but if him and his new girlfriend are meant to be, then they will be. However, you simply cannot ruin someone else’s life for your own selfish gain.

Imagine if it was you in his girlfriends position: how heartbroken you’d be knowing the man you love is being poached by another girl?

You may have been there, I certainly have been, when there is nothing you can do to stop the person you love going off with someone else – even if they are better suited. Because that hurt is indescribably painful.

Don’t put someone through that. Let the relationship run it’s course, and if you’re meant to be together, simply, you will be.

In the meantime, focus on your hobbies, maybe stay single for a bit if you feel it may work out in your favour, but don’t express your feelings to him. In fact, stay away from the friendship a little bit if you feel that you’ll make an impact. You’ll confuse him and potentially ruin your friendship forever.

As much as ‘fate’ is an exciting concept, I don’t particularly believe in it – you make your own luck and future, but if you are as suited and meant to be as you think, then it will happen.

Love,