When you’re in a relationship or have been dating someone for a while, it can be really easy to become super complacent in your happiness.
You’re quite content, comfortable almost, in where you are. You think, “I don’t need to make the effort like I did in the beginning”. You think, “my partner likes the way I am, just how we are”.
And you may be right. Your partner may love how you guys are together, the dynamic you have and the comfy relationship you have, knowing neither of you are going anywhere.
However what you probably don’t realise is that this comfort can quickly make the relationship go stale. ‘Stale!?’ I hear you cry.
Yes, boring. Samey. Stale.
In fact, one of the biggest relationship killers is simply, complacency.
Basically, we don’t show our partners nearly enough how much we love them, after all – they put up with our grumpiness, stress and arguments. It can mean a lot to receive a small act of kindness and love.
[Read: The #1 Reason A Relationship Goes Stale]So how do you get out of the rut and improve your relationship? How do you simply add a little spark back in your love life?
Firstly – don’t fret. It’s really easy to do small and easy things to remind your partner you care. It’s these little things which will enhance and evolve your relationship.
We value more what we invest in- so the more we invest in our relationships, the better it is for everyone! It’s so important to foster our relationships with our loved ones, after all, we love them!
[Read: 15 Simple and Easy Ways to Make your Girl Happy]Here are some ways of surprising your partner on occasion and show them that you are growing as a person.
#1 Plan a surprise romantic lunch or dinner on a work day
When was the last time you surprised them at lunch or after work (have you ever)? Surprise them or make reservations for their favourite cuisine restaurant! It needn’t be expensive, but mixing things up can be really fun!
#2 Compliment them out of the blue
It’s completely and utterly free. Remind them that you love their eyes, how soft their hair is or how great they look in those jeans. Compliment them on something which isn’t necessarily generic or about their aesthetic. Tell them how proud you are with an achievement they’ve had, or how inspired they make you or how hardworking they are.
They will appreciate you noticing and it making you feel happy for them.
#3 Buy them flowers or something edible and small which they’d love
Flowers are considered to be cliché, hence why many people just avoid giving them. However, giving your partner their favourite flowers out of the blue (and not because you’ve done something wrong!) or something luxuriously edible (some fancy choccies or their favourite sweets) can be really thoughtful.
Imagine how simple it is – and then think about how much happiness it can bring. Something so small can bring a smile to your partner’s face when they least expect it, so why wouldn’t you do it once in a while?
#4 Pamper them
Nothing is more exciting than being spontaneously pampered like a king/queen.
Treat your partner to a massage, stroke their hair, or draw them a really nice warm bubble bath (to share!) with some candles to create a super relaxed atmosphere.
If you’re feeling really prepared, why not pop to the shops and get a couple of face masks for you both to enjoy!
#5 Leave a little note / post-it notes
Why wait for Valentine’s Day to tell them how you feel? Another free surprise is to hide little post-it notes with unique or kind words written on! Leave on the mirror before you go to work, or hide in their lunchbox or coat pocket.
Writing a longer note expressing how much you care for them is also a really smile-rending idea which is super easy.
#6 Plan a night which they’d love
You know them, arguably, better than anyone else. You know what they love and care about, you know their favourite meals and films – so why not use this information in your favour?
Make a night of thoughtfulness by preparing their favourite dinner and cuddling up to their favourite film (even if you hate it!). Or go to the cinema and see a film you know they’d love, or visit an exhibition /market/outdoors view which they’ll appreciate.
#7 Remind them how much you care when they’re at work
How many seconds does it take to send a text? About 10 (20 if you’re slow).
Drop your partner a little loving text when they’d normally not expect anything, letting them know you’re thinking of them.
Something as simple as “just wanted to let you know that I’m thinking of you” or telling them you love them can really brighten their day.
#8 Make breakfast in bed
Not necessarily restricted to weekends, making breakfast doesn’t have to be laborious!
Whether it be thick porridge with berries and honey, a full english, or simply a warm croissant, surprising your partner with breakfast in bed and a hot cuppa will start their day off so well they’ll be grinning for the rest of it.
#9 Pick a task they hate doing and do it for them
Taking out the bins, washing up, cleaning. What does your partner loath doing? Pick something and do just it for them – without them asking.
This tiny act can improve your partner’s day immensely, just because they no longer have to think about doing it!
#10 Book a trip!
If you’re feeling a little more adventurous, book a weekend away – something UK based like Brighton, Norfolk or the Peak District can be just as lovely as a trip abroad, say Amsterdam, Brussels or Paris.
Pick a romantic break, there are plenty of last minute booking websites!
Don’t forget to look after yourself too
It’s not always about putting in effort to please your partner. Improving your relationship also means looking after yourself: keep healthy, treat yourself to a nice outfit, enjoy your hobbies and time with friends and family, and generally make yourself feel attractive, happy and confident.
Keep that passion for life. Life is about balance and continual growth, maintain your strength and confidence in yourself.
Combine these and you and your partner will reap the benefits!
